Puckodum - Jakob Burrows' Blog


Already I've given frightening insight into the insane stories I used to write when I was ten years old, but I hope you're prepared to fall even deeper down this rabbit hole! You can brush up by reading those earlier posts if you like, but basically it was a Pokémon parody starring a moose called "älgen Moose". His first name wasn't capitalized because he was never baptised.

Here below I have scanned and reproduced one of these books. Half the page was meant for writing and the other half for drawing, but since I often had a pretty minimalist approach to the text portion I went through these little orange books at a frightening pace. The text is Swedish but I've put translations below each page. Translation notes are marked as [TN].

Don't expect it to make sense, and know that älgen is a bit of an antihero. Partly this is because these stories come from the same brain that cut obituaries out of the newspaper and invented a game where the highest age wins; but it's also partly because I played Pokémon Red and Silver all the time and was upset that you couldn't join the bad guys. There was even a point in the game where the criminals ask you to join them and there wasn't even an option to say yes! Upsetting!

You should also know that älgen hung out with this very powerful Puckodum called "Mewduck" who was like Mew but... a duck. This Puckodum could do anything but rarely assisted älgen in evil because it was too kind hearted. (Except yeah it looks like Mewduck exploded a guy down there on page 22.)

CAPTION: This is älgen. He is ten years old.

LEFT CAPTION: Some background info. Everything started at the New Moose hospital.
DOCTOR: No, not again! [TN: This was maybe the fourth time I rebooted the story from scratch.]
RIGHT CAPTION: Älgen and his brother, älgen, are born.

LEFT CAPTION: Their first explosion but not their last...
[TN: The pig they were pulling apart on the previous page was a bomb I guess?]
ÄLGEN: Hm, how does this thing work?
RIGHT CAPTION: The problems continue...

LEFT CAPTION: And continue...
RIGHT CAPTION: Until they end (unhappily).
ÄLGEN: Now I know. This was fun.

LEFT CAPTION: Älgen went to a Puckodum school.
[TN: So like the teacher who is called "Mrs Lunch Lady" asks what the Puckodum on the screen is and both the students get it wrong. Hilarious. Their answers are "stone" and "stick" which are actual Puckodum, but they are still wrong.]
RIGHT CAPTION: Today they're getting their first Puckodum. Älgen chose...

LEFT CAPTION: ...None! Because they ran out.
ÄLGEN: D'oh!
RIGHT CAPTION: But at least he got a Puckodex.

LEFT CAPTION: But out in the tall grass he found a Puckodum!
RIGHT CAPTION: Älgen threw a schoolball at the duck and it worked!!

LEFT CAPTION: Not! Älgen ran after it.
RIGHT CAPTION: Someone else caught the duck.

LEFT CAPTION: Älgen went to Lake of Rage
ÄLGEN: A guy stole my Puckodum
LANCE: do you need help
RIGHT CAPTION: Älgen got to borrow a Puckodum.

LEFT CAPTION: The guy who took the duck was from Rocket Head so älgen went to one of their bases.
RIGHT CAPTION: He got to the top floor with Igura who was a strong because... älgen hadn't trained it.

LEFT CAPTION: On the top floor he met Givony
RIGHT CAPTION: Älgen agreed to join Team Rock Head.
ÄLGEN: Okay, but only if I get to hurt people...

LEFT CAPTION: Älgen got back the duck, who was called Mewduck, and it decided to come with älgen
RED BOX: The one who caught Mewduck.
RIGHT CAPTION: Then the guy from Lake of Rage showed up but älgen scrammed with a jet pack [TN: actually I called it a "getpack" which translates as "goat pack". It's a pun, sort of.]

Okay so that is exactly half of one of these books. I might post the other half in the future but either way I think you get the idea. This was probably one of the later books because it is has a certain style and rhythm that was lacking in my earlier work, where the text was usually long and rambling rather than short and snappy. To finish off, here are some sneak peeks of the rest of this book:

January 29th, 2015